Tips For Soon To Wed And Those Married

For Your Marriage to Succeed, It Needs to Be Balanced AND Happy

This is about the importance of starting a marriage with a person who will effectively share in the responsibilities and decision-making of a life together -- this person is your spouse.

With that said, there are certainly a handful of important points that lie within both the marriage (partnership) that you must address and, most important, address them before they happen so that you don’t find yourself in a situation where your happiness is at risk.

The best marriages come when you’ve found another person that doesn’t share the same capabilities and/or thought processes. To be specific, someone that’s not like you. Like the saying goes Opposites Attract!

So in order to get the benefits of a successful marriage, you need to have some opposing ideas and differing but complimentary skill sets and although you both need to know and understand what is going on throughout the marriage (no deliberate hiding of information allowed), it’s really important to remember as well that you DO NOT share every decision.

Part of an effective marriage is knowing that you can trust your "better half" to do what’s best and make the right decisions in their day-to-day responsibilities.

Of course you need to work together on the larger decisions that affect the direction of your marriage, but if you’re both overseeing the same things, it’s going to quickly feel like one person is looking over the other’s shoulder. Also, this is completely inefficient and needless to say irritating!

How do you communicate?

You must remember you’re not going to be able to talk about every single decision -- as covered in the previous point -- but you do need to understand what’s going on throughout the marriage and that, comes with communication.

Make sure that you set up a regular specific time to talk -- and use the opportunity to discuss the greater decisions that were or need to be made so you can both add in from your differing view points or areas of expertise to come to the best decisions for your marriage.

You ABSOLUTELY must set expectations!

This point is really one that needs to be established well before you marry -- although sometimes it’s just not that simple (love can be overwhelming).

You and your spouse need to have an understanding, as to who is responsible for what and what the expectations are for your time and responsibilities, as well as any financial commitments.

It’s really easy to just believe that you’re married and you’ll work anything out and it may be uncomfortable to sit and discuss expectations, but when things get really difficult, everyone’s true colors show and you need to be able to recall what those expectations are.

Summary:

1. Share responsibilities and decision-making;
2. Address issues before they blow out of hand;
3. Be grateful and acknowledge your spouse is your OPPOSITE;
4. While you share EVERY information, you DON'T share every decision.
5. Trust your "better half" to do what’s best and make the right decisions in their day-to-day responsibilities.
6. Set up a regular specific time to talk.
7. Set expectations early and don't forget them -- time, responsibilities and financial commitments.